Untitled Number 12

Like rubber I strech myself away

though in secret one hand clings to you

You stand so still, unfeeling,

while I pull in pain

I say “I’ll go”

as scars of guilt are etched beneath my skin

and you say “Go.

Your right to leave I can’t deny.”

 

 

 

I face the sunlight

yet scenes so dark come flowing through

My fervent wish is just to snap

And  part of me

will be left with you

Because you never will ask,never will demand

and you never will know

that what I hoped you would say was

 

 

“Stay.”

Photo-Inspire Me Tag

 I was tagged by Potpot

“pictures speak a thousand words, but for me, only one word can describe this picture…”

 

Here’s the rule:

 

Write a poem or an inspiring line based on a photo of your choice. This photo can be your own, or someone else’s. (If the picture is not yours, please ask permission from the owner when you post it, or better yet, provide only the link to the picture that inspired you, without posting it.)

Your poem or inspiring line may be of any length, and any genre. It can be humorous, sentimental, heart-warming, whatever. You may write in Ilokano, English or Filipino.

Post your inspiring line in your blog and in the comment section of this page (or just a link to your post so we could go and check it there). For poetry submissions, please indicate if you wish your piece to be posted in Bilingual Pen as an article submission.

The goal of this game is to get us to write, and express our thoughts and emotions

 

 

 

 

The Beach

and the grains of sand scrub away

the callouses of doubt

and the scorching hot sun melts down

the the icy tower of pride

and the salt in the air gently cleanses

the eyes that used to see nothing

and sound of the waves comforts the

childlish, fluttering, playful heart

and the warmth of you sitting next to me

is enough to make me forget

that I am me, and you are you

and we are here

for there is only

the beach

 

 

 

Now I’m tagging prinsesamusang.

 

dreamboy 2.1

Shengka, on Kat:

“Alam ko na kung sino ang Queen of Inconsistencies!!!!”

 

 

dreamboy 2.1

ever so elusive, even in dreams

by the jalousied window he leans

outside the walls I try to ignore

the face I’ve never seen here before

finally, the old dreamboy replaced

by the king babbler who cut and paste

pieces of me into his domain

crept through vulnerability lain

woke up to sourgraping in full swing

controlled by this emotional machine

as dreamworld ended I still see

the hand that shut the window on me

Quick

Quick, grab my hand and jump
can’t answer now, you see
Hear the sound, the loud thump
a fool’s decisive glee

 
Now, I think and unthink
Quite sure I want it still
This moment, I won’t blink
To see my wicked thrill

 
Quick, throw reason away
the time is short, you see
I know you want to stay
And be sinful with me

Dear Sun

dear sun, time has divided us
cut us up with sharp steel blades
that we not meet at any point
despite the efforts made
my sun, distance has placed
a nagging silence in between
the rays that once connect
our meeting place no longer seen
oh sun, your power thwarted
by my own preoccupied mind
of boasting lovely colors
for the butterflies around
please heed your favored flower
waving helplessly, needing light
save me from the hands
of the crusher holding tight
had I been picked out of
your territory, I’m still yours
my sun, I’m longing for you
Love, your isolated rose

 

 

for ferdie yoboh

Phone Pal

(yeah, I know, that phone pal thing is so 90’s, but this one formed itself in my head last night)

 

i wondered how to free myself
when willing to be chained
a force so strong,a voice I long
to hear again and again
the rich, hot wanting creeping through
my body’s left me maimed
your trap, you wicked mystery
all I know’s your catchy name
and how to let myself go
of your effortless strong hold?
and how to not think of you when
on the first hello I was sold?
Well, I didn’t have to try so hard
you pushed me far aside
you empty shell, you babbling rut
the infection now has died

Chat

I glanced at my watch
and I grabbed the arms of my swivel chair
heart drumming madly,
thinking what the hell
I’m ecstatic, like a giggly schoolgirl
and it’s not because I had a long rest
but in fact because I’ve been so restless
two false alarms
and I screamed
really screamed, in frustration and hate
frustrated because I hated seeing not you
hating myself because I’m frustrated
but I like it so much it puts
a smile on my face
even that painful smile pleases me
to levels I haven’t had in a long time
and now, willing myself not to peek
into expected disappointment
and not to wait for you, doraemon
because you probably will not call again
and oh it drives me crazy
and it feels so good, i’m running
in circles, flipping and pulling the scarf
on my neck
and wishing, hoping against hope
I’m not the only one
It’s all me in the room for the crazies
biting my lip and singing to an invisible doll
looking into the mirror and hoping to see
his point of view
not knowing anything,
but this ripe,hot wanting
and longing
seriously infected disease
that I still happily embrace
is it just my body?
ist it just my mind?
it seems to be all of me
and it’s not a good sign
it’s leading into the destruction
of me and all I’ve hoped for
but the path to it
is simply irresistable
i peeked, and squinted my eyes
knowing I’m gonna see something
that would make my heart beat slower
but hey, I still did
infection, it’s running through me
and then, the signal is on
signal for me to smile happily
into thin air, and hate myself some more
but although it’s hauntingly suspicious
and inevitably destructive
I type, cut and paste
and click and then I wait
it’s a freaking rush
that I must stop myself
from being flown and blown away
and i must grip tight to the ropes of
the right path, they are not
slippery, but still my hand slips away
consciously, purposely, knowingly
i’m allowing it to creep through my system
and consume me,
burn me like the phoenix
so that i may live again.